mad daisy

loves of my life

2011-05-08T18:04:00.001-07:00

that's the dickens

2011-05-07T21:28:00.000-07:00

"and perhaps second hand cares, like second hand clothes, come easily off and on."

I'm waiting with a vaguely poignant desire for SNL to begin. Oh Seth Myers, what would I do without your sarcastic commentary and wrinkly smile that so greatly resemble your brother in that 70's show?

Do my homework, probably.

Wanna hear some funny quotes? (I'm far too unoriginal/unmotivated to come up with my own things for DABs to put as their facebook status so they seem intellectual. ...Granted, they post these things with atrocious grammer, while listening to the brilliant lyricism of wiz kalifa: 'black stripe, yellow paint, them niggas scared of it but them ho's ain't'- exquisite, so it's usually counterproductive.)
- Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too, bitch.
- I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Libra and she's a bitch.
- I love using big words to sound smart. I mean utilizing gargantuan idioms to fabricate intelligence.
- Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
- The smile is every woman's sexiest curve.
- I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If he figures it out, he's worth a shot.
- Trust in God but lock your car.

2011-02-22T13:35:00.000-08:00

reach for the stars, even though you may never reach them, bound to this tear-wridden ground as you are.

Psalm 63

2011-02-13T14:22:00.000-08:00

You, God, are my God,
earnestly I seek you;
I thirst for you,
my whole being longs for you,
in a dry and parched land
where there is no water.

Let Me Sleep

2010-12-16T21:34:00.000-08:00

My pillows burst at the seams
with sickened thoughts and infected dreams
i pray every night they won't tell
I don't believe in hell
but when i close my eyes it's far from heaven i see inside.

Thankful

2010-11-25T21:46:00.001-08:00

Sometimes i forget that I am in the top 10% of the richest people in the world, and how lucky I am that there is a roof over my head. Sometimes I feel like my life is hard, when compared to millions of people I am spoiled. Sometimes I wallow in the fact that I am single...

During these times i flash back. Tears are dripping over my chin and into my homemade taco, my hands shake as I eat. Around me are puffy eyes and running noses belonging to the people sharing in my emotions. I can't bring my self to look at the man in the front of the room. I don't need to. His voice is a blade, repeatedly striking me. He holds up his hand and slowly his fingers go up one by one, he is silent, but I count in my head. One. Two. Three. Four. I take another bite, my hands are shaking. Five. Six. Seven. I wince, my shoulders crouching up around my shoulders... eight. "Rape!" He shouts.

The girl next to me is sobbing. I know why, but I pretend like I don't and I pat her knee. Trying to get her to stop crying, trying to get her to forget. "Murder!" He shouts. Eight seconds have gone by. "Molestation!" Eight more.

It's hard to eat, but I choke down my food. I am so thankful that I have some, so lucky to be here, so guilty that it's me living this privileged life and not someone more deserving.

Every eight seconds, a woman somewhere is either molested, raped, or murdered. Evey eight seconds I thanks god it's not me. I don't know why he put me here. I have no idea why I was born as lucky as I was, but I am more thankful than words can describe.

So happy Thanksgiving, and bless you all.

2010-11-06T23:16:00.001-07:00

Split me to a thousand pieces
Crack me watch me burn
With a cry my chest releases
A desperate plead for life’s new leases
My face creases in sorrow
Nothing left but tomorrow
A shallow promise I still have
One more day left to wallow

The Office

2010-09-18T15:40:00.000-07:00

"Ok, let me see if I understand this. In your wildest fantasy, you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil"
-Jim Halpert

"Jim is gone. He's gone. I miss him so much. Ooooh I cry myself to sleep, Jim! False. I do not miss him."
-Dwight Shrute

"No, no, I need two men on this. That’s what she said. No time! But she did. NO TIME!"
-Micheal Scott

"I hate so much about the things you choose to be."
-Micheal Scott

2010-09-07T15:16:00.000-07:00

Dear You,

I miss the way you used to be. Happier, like you didn't care really what people thought? Like... what people thought of me. And, I could pretty much just be my loser self and it was fine and, I didn't have to pretend that i was different. And I guess we were nerdy but it was cool cuz I mean no one was there but us sooo DEGAF. People change, and I know that, and I'm not mad or upset. I just miss having someone to talk to who doesn't judge me. You know, things are different now, and maybe we won't talk anymore. I just hope you never turn into to one of those people who doesn't want to say hi to me for fear of what other people might think.

I don't really know what to say anymore, so I guess I'll see you around.

Truth.

2010-08-21T20:20:00.001-07:00

Party Review, Cuz I'm creative with my titles like that.

2010-07-29T00:30:00.001-07:00

So, I read this book called party. And I wanted to document my initial reaction, even though I told myself I would be in bed before 12, but whatever. I just sort of felt as though I could relate to the idea behind it. It mentions the theme of "oh I've got to do such and such thing before high school is over", and It's crazy, because high school is really short. When your like five, playing school with your barbies, high school is as far as you can think. Yeah, I bragged about wanting to be an actress when I was like 20, but that was only in theory. I never imagined things past the locker lined hallways of high school. Then you get here, and you're thinking about college and driving and other stuff that you didn't even know about... Pretty sure you catch my drift with that one? Well, if you didn't it doesn't matter. And you reallise, damn, waiting to do something, waiting to talk to some guy for example, can go on and on and then you get your yearbook and a packet of college applications as your headed out the door senior year and that's it. I guess this was kind of just a reflection of high school life thus far, and how it is not always incorrectly depicted through media, or in this case literature.

Girl, Interrupted

2010-07-27T00:18:00.000-07:00

I saw a movie today called Girl, Interrupted. It was AMAZING. Not exactly the subject matter, like I could care less about an awkward crazy chick from the 60's, but Angelia Jolie's acting was really REALLY good. These are just some of my favorite quotes. (Not sure weather or not I will read the book seeing as I have summer reading that I've been putting off all summer and now have to finish in a week...)

Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still?
-Girl, Interrupted

You know, they're building a new Disney Land in Florida. If I could have any job in the world, I'd be a professional Cinderella. You could be Snow White. And Polly could be Minnie Mouse. Everyone would hug her and kiss her and love her and no one would ever know what was in that big ol' head of hers, you know?
-Lisa Rowe (Girl, Interrupted)

I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside.
-Susana Kaysen (Girl, Interrupted)

Maybe everyone out there is a liar. And maybe the whole world is stupid, and ignorant. But I'd rather be in it. Id' rather be fucking in it, than down here with you.
-Susana Kaysen (Girl, Interrupted)

Was I ever crazy? Maybe. Or maybe life is... Crazy isn't being broken or swallowing a dark secret. It's you or me amplified. If you ever told a lie and enjoyed it. If you ever wished you could be a child forever.
-Girl, Interrupted

Lisa Rowe: You know, there's too many buttons in the world. There's too many buttons and they're just- There's way too many just begging to be pressed,they're just begging to be pressed,you know? They're just - they're just begging to be pressed, and it makes me wonder, it really makes me fucking wonder, why doesn't anyone ever press mine? Why am I so neglected? Why doesn't anyone reach in and rip out the truth and tell me that I'm a fucking whore, or that my parents wish I were dead?
Susanna Kaysen: Because you're dead already, Lisa.
-Girl, Interrupted

Yeah, well that's what ther-rape-me's all about. That's why fuckin' Freud's picture's on every shrink's wall. He created a fuckin' industry. You lie down, you confess your secrets and you're saved. Ca-ching! The more you confess, the more they think about settin' you free.
-Lisa Rowe (Girl, Interrupted)

Susanna Kaysen: You don't want me, Tony.
Tony: Yes I do, baby.
Susanna Kaysen: No, you don't. I'm... a crazy girl.
Tony: You're crazy so we can't have one night of bliss?
Susanna Kaysen: I am a crazy girl. Seriously.
Tony: You've been in a hospital?
Susanna Kaysen: Yes.
Tony: Do you see purple people? My friend, he saw purple people. And so the state came and took him away. He didn't like that. Some time went by and, and he told 'em he didn't see purple people no more.
Susanna Kaysen: He got better.
Tony: Nah, he still sees 'em.
-Girl, Interrupted

Break Through

2010-07-24T23:52:00.000-07:00

You know you're wallowing in your problems when you legit feel as though you're going through the life of one of the characters in South Park. You know those annoying Goth kids on the show? They were reading poetry in the fat chicks room, and i swear they were lines from my poems. My life isn't even bad! I need to learn how to deal with shit. Instead of becoming Goth/dark as a way of coping with my problems, i need to enjoy life before I'm out of high school. So here goes.
"Hey Alexa? You're a bitch. And Jason? Right here buddy." *Flips him off with a grin.

A brief backtrack into the time where I only saw black and white, and it made me smile.

2010-07-06T14:06:00.000-07:00

On the edge of the world, watching it all end. You and you lover. Not moving, barley breathing, watching the society crumble. "Look!" They say, pointing with a shadowy hand to a building crumpling down into rubble. You smile, if that's even possible for one so gone, because the earth doesn't matter. Every thing could cease to be, and you two wouldn't care. Blissfully happy as the world heaves it's last breathe, you both are enchanted. Maybe they're not even there, maybe it's just your shadow. That's all right. Let the world die, it doesn't matter anymore. The shadow leads you deep into the recesses of your mind, and you two smile as everything rots away.

Take a Deep Breath...

2010-07-05T23:44:00.000-07:00

I'm stressing a bit. I have a job that I feel rather unqualified for that I need to do. I've known about it for the while, but I've been suppressing it. Nudging it away into the back of my mind and telling it to "shhh", only now it's staring me in the face.

And once again, I find myself coming up with a lack of words to put here.

I think that's why I write poetry, you don't have to write a ton. It looks better the more white space you put. Plus, people think it's about something deeper when really your putting sentences that sound nice together.

Also, for the time being I am staying away from facebook.

sunshine
layouts.

Loose Ends

2010-06-23T01:37:00.001-07:00

What if I end up liking you?
Wouldn’t that be strange
Then I’ll just be a puppet
In your ‘player’ game
Just friends
But don’t you get the feeling
Our friendship has loose ends
And the thought sends me reeling
For a moment
Or two
But then I look at you
And it’s back to normal
Crack a joke and I smile
After all, it’s not worth it
For just a little while
For a little happy bubble
In this beat down world
And anyways?
It’s absurd
Feeling things like that
Cuz I don’t
I don’t think
I mean do you?
But I won’t ask.

sunshine
layouts.

Lace Me Up

2010-06-17T14:55:00.000-07:00

lace me up
tighten my corset of
ribs the squeeze me
I'm folding in on myself
but please don't release me
My skin, it shrinks
a man-made python
you can't see it
I don't want the light on
my body or my mind
really im just fine
a few more pounds to go
and i'll be right as rain
The pain? forget it
it'l be worth it, just see
i'm much better now
then when I was size three

sunshine
layouts.

By posting this I am by no means trying to advocate anorexia, or any other eating disorders. I understand that they are serious diseases that plague the lives of those people affected by them. When I write I slip into a different character, most of my poetry isn't about me or my life at all. It is either someone else's life, sensationalized, or in most cases completely made up. (I just wanted to add this so I don't offend any one)

Where has the summer gone?

2010-06-14T13:44:00.000-07:00

Sand squeezes through the hourglass
It’s rushing and racing
I can do nothing but watch the time pass
It speeds by, laughing.
Where did all that time go?
The happily ever after I was promised?
Why hasn’t the hour stopped at midnight,
The sun’s rising now. I missed my chance.
I wanted to talk to you
There were so many things we could have said
Memories shared together as the stars gleam.
But the fire monster ate the twinkling stars.
It gobbled them up, and with a hearty burp,
It grinned while I sat there alone
My only is company unrealized dreams and fantasies.
So will this be my unending fate?
While my mind runs drunk with fantasies
Must I sit here sober, dealing with reality?
How many missed opportunities will it take
For me to try and catch one?
Only to watch it slip through my fingers,
Because I haven’t had enough practice.
sunshine
layouts.

Half the time goes by, suddenly you're wise, another blink of an eye childhood is gone.

2010-06-06T00:11:00.000-07:00

Imagine You're in a room. It's a party, your all dressed up. The place is fancy, elegant. Probably a ballroom in a hotel.

The room is filled with people, you walk around, and you see yourself in a mirror. You're alot older than you remember yourself. You're fifteen.

Music trickles in and out of you consciousness, it is play somewhere in the background. The melodious tones of five for fighting's '100 years' is playing in the back ground. "I'm 15 for a moment," You see yourself mouth in the mirror. "Caught in between 10 and 20 and I'm just dreaming, counting the ways to where you are."

Your mind drifts back to the camp you went to in 8th grade, about acceptance. You were doing an exorcise when you had to hold everyone's hand and look at them for 30 seconds. Faces fly by. People you love just smile, people you barley know make you laugh, people you hate make you cry, and then a stranger drys your tears.

And then your holding hands with this one kid, and your looking at him, and your blushing. You've liked him for awhile. And he does this crazy thing, he says "you have beautiful eyes".

You see him in the mirror, he's across the room. He's standing there, eyes blank, looking into space, trying not to think. There's an empty bottle of pills in his pocket...

You look around again. There's the girl who you've known all your life. The one who was there with you when your brother was born, hiding under the bed in the next room, playing with dolls. She wears makeup now, and she's talking to a boy. You start to feel alone.

You turn around, there's the girl you danced with when you were eight. The girl who's house was your second home. You would go over to talk to her... But the studio closed. The good times dried up. She's with her best friend. There's nothing left to say.

You walk out of the room, walking past faces you have known all your life. But you don't know them anymore. They're all older now.

Your heels clack on the wooden floor as you make your way to the door. Glancing to your left, you see the kid who used to be one of your best friends. Now, you talk to him and don't know what to say.

You look away and meet eyes with the nerdy girl from elementary school. Her dress is so low cut you can almost see her belly button, eyes have so much makeup on them you can hardly see her face. She sneers as you walk past.

You're running now, past the pretty girl you were friends with in 3rd grade who's getting in the car with a boy she doesn't know. Past the friend who was the worlds biggest tomboy, and is now being cheated on as she cries in a corner. Past the girl who you were so mean to in 5th grade, she's sitting alone with her clarinet. Past the girl who wanted so badly to be popular. She got her wish... by cutting all ties with her best friend.

Each step you take you feel older, each face adds to the weight of the world on your shoulders. You're fifteen, but you feel like 15,000. You reach the outdoors, it's snowing, and your panting breath slides in and out of you mouth with a ghostly white fog. You look around.

There are people here too. These ones are also 15.

These are the people that make you laugh everyday. The one's you know now, this moment, they're happy to see you. You glance back at the party. You realize that it's never going to end. You look around at the people.

You realize that's okay.

sunshine
layouts.

Inspired by someone I've only spoken to a few times but has left a lasting impression

2010-05-31T00:23:00.000-07:00

Close your eyes again
Lids slide over bloodshot spheres
A mouth draws a shaky breath
Fingers release a bottle of pills
That falls empty to the floor
You feel your head hit the tile
It’s a twisted deja-vu
A vile taste creeps into your mouth
You can tell it will be over soon.
It started off just playing
A stupid thing to pass the time
But the toy became a weapon
An assassin bent on your demise
The drugs are the reason she left you
But it’s too late to give ‘em up
Daddy had his alcohol, she had her throwin up
She was skinny you were addicted
She got better you got worse
And as you lay there on the tile,
All you can think of is her
She got out of the hospital, better and carefree
You stayed in your basement with drugs for company
She wanted nothing to do with you
But addiction was there to listen
And now you’re in it’s arms
And it’s her you’re really missin.

sunshine
layouts.

Translations

2010-05-21T15:26:00.000-07:00

When You Say…

It’s over between me and her

I hate being around her

I love you

You mean:

We’re unofficially seeing each other

I’m hanging out with her later

We’re just friends

When I Say…

It’s cool that you guys still talk

I like hanging out with you

*Laughs* Love ‘ya too

I Mean:

Why is she always around

I want to do more than just hang out

I wish you really did love me…

2010-05-15T15:22:00.000-07:00

Hip hop in its Essence is Real.

Dirty Little Secret

2010-04-25T15:15:00.000-07:00

So, it's been a while since i've written anything here. There's no reason really, there was just nothing for me to say.

Anyways, I watched the video Dirty Little Secret by the All American Rejects and I got inspired to take this picture. My secret is on there, don't worry. It's in the bottom right corner. Ironically, it doesn't show up on camera (:

I ain't gonna stop until I see police and lights.

2010-04-13T18:57:00.000-07:00

I am getting restless
I am getting tested
And I can't believe he's always out every night and never checks in
Is he cheating? Man I don't know
I am looking around for something else to throw

I'm breaking dishes up in here all night.

^^^Recital dance song. Guess which part I'm playing?

Apparently dance has a sense of humor.

sunshine
layouts.

2010-04-04T22:00:00.000-07:00

A verry merry unbirthday to you all.

Living on Nothing

2010-03-30T15:53:00.001-07:00

meaningless jumbles of syllables slip out of my mouth
vowels dribble down my chin
constants cut my upper lip
they fall as i unleash an empty grin

everyone just nods- meaning, it seems, is irrelevant.

don't take time to listen to what i say
because there's nothing there to listen to
emptiness hides behinds shadows of sounds
a whisper of bluejay wings
the click of acrillic claws
a laugh fades away into dust

don't listen for the whisperer
it's hiding behind the whisper
once you take it away,
all you see is a nothing
just a shadow
just a hint of a whiff of a breeze in the wind

i float away on the last breath of words
leaving my emptiness behind.

sunshine
layouts.

About Me.

2010-03-22T14:50:00.000-07:00

This is the real about me. The one i would be too afraid to put on facebook.

I belive that knowing the words to 'cool' songs makes me supirior.
I enjoy clothes that showcase my love of comforming appearance-wise.
I find the ginger lead singer from nevershout never inexplicably attractive.
For me, being home to watch snl every saturday isn't evidence of my non-existant social life, rather, it showcases my love for seth myers and his weekend updates.
Youtube is my (insert addicting illegal drug of your choice here).
My dream car is a shaggin-wagon. Ya no, those awesome old hippie vans. Like the one Kelso has in that 70's show, but yellow.
I wish I was back in elementary school, simply because no one cared what you were like as long as you shared your oreos at lunch.
Guys confuse me.
And i'm (finally) starting to be happy with my life.

princess is a cliche'

2010-02-15T15:27:00.000-08:00

I was ridiculously bored this afternoon and I decided to try something.

I went into my room, dressed up like a goth weirdo, taped the camera to the ceeling, grabbed my guitar, and took a picture. I think it looks pretty cool(:

I wanted the focus to be on my makeup, but I accidentally left my head out. Woops. So I tried again and the camera came off the ceiling and hit my leg, Joy. So... I gave up. I'm currently trying to decide weather or not I have to guts to upload this to facebook. (I'm probli never gonna)

This one looked cooler in black and white, so you can't see the color of my eyeshadow. But, if you look closely, you'll see that I put a bit of white eyliner on the end of each of my eyelashes. It kind of helps with the whole doll-like look.

And yes, that is a roasary I'm wearing, I didn't have any other pearls. I'm still wearing it actually, but I put the other pearls back in my mom's room so she won't know I am borrowing them.

And one last thing- I swear that if my brother has not eaten the valentines candy he got by next week I'm stealing it.

That is all(:

sooo... i'm stupid.

2010-02-14T21:32:00.000-08:00

They say you leave your heart in Paris, but I for one, certainly hope that isn’t the case, my heart being of such vitality I wouldn’t be able to do without.

And were I to leave my heart somewhere outside the saftey of my own being, I would imagine I wouldn’t want to keep in too far off, just in case I needed to snatch it back.

For I find those who take your heart seem to be those who protect it least, and my heart has oft been trampled on by many a careless taker, abandoning it like a humingbird who leaves one flower as soon as another one is in sight.

So let the humming bird fly, and don’t bother it with such a trivial thought as my heart, for though I cannot do without, the hummingbird certainly can.

And as you watch the fleeting bird fly away towards the beconing petals of a different flower, I shall lock away my heart so that it won’t be mistaken for someone’s toy, and left behind in Paris.

sunshine
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Love is when you dont want to go to sleep, b/c reality is finally better than your dreams.
-Dr. Suess
quote of the day^^^

And two other thoughts:

I really wanted to talk to this person, and i didn't. I was waiting for him to talk to me. So therefore, I am stupid.

and his eyes are blue.

sunshine
layouts.

screw you, writer's block.

2010-02-13T23:20:00.000-08:00

So i'm rather upset this evening for two reasons-
1.) the video I spent two hours editing for my guru channel on youtube decided to get saved wrong, and now it will not open.
2.) i have writer's block.

I started a story less than a year ago about 4 girls at a camp. I just wanted it to be something fun, a light easy story.

That is, I originally wanted it to be a light, fun story.

But... I grew up since then. And I want the characters to be real. And in order to do that they have to have problems, and flaws, and be a little messed up.

Cuz my stories are based off my life, that's the only way I know how to make them real, and now i'm trying to go back and put some of my problems into them. But I go back and read the original and I feel that it's more entertaining. And, really, isn't it all about pleasing your audience?

sunshine
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Favorite quote of the week-
Dear homework, you are not attractive and I am not doing you.
-facebook

We Had to Write a Haiku In English, Here's Mine:

2010-02-04T14:49:00.000-08:00

Kid in front of me
your really pissing me off
turn your ipod down

My Mind is Empty,

2010-02-03T14:33:00.000-08:00

sunshine
layouts.

Searching for cool

2010-02-02T16:03:00.000-08:00

Today I had a little chat with an old friend. We used to be really tight, but we had a falling out a while back for the strangest reason. See, back then, my impressionable pre-teen mind was consumed with the idea of popularity. I would have given anything to be cool.

"You want my arm? Sure, as long as I can come to the party with all the cool kids this weekend.

It will cost me my leg too? Okay, it sounds like a rad party."

It was really that bad. And, I didn't think this girl was cool. She wore different clothes, her boyfriends were nerdy, and she was friends with all the orch dorks. So I got the idea in my head that if I ditched her, I would become cool too.

But here's the thing, I didn't.

I went to the parties, I chilled with the mean girls, I even had my first boyfriend. And I hated every minute of it. Until I had an epiphany- 'cool' doesn't exist.

Because what is 'cool' really? It's whatever you decide it to be. And popularity isn't obtainable simply by coveting it,

because popularity is only confidence in disguise.

And now, I'm so much happier with my under-the-radar life. So, i think i'll keep my arm, but you guys have fun at the party, cuz i heard it's gonna be bomb.

sunshine
layouts.

Amazingly, the drama monster appears to have disapeared, so this is the last time I will mention it. It will be like it never happened.

Juno quotes.

2010-02-02T15:36:00.000-08:00

How about some quotes from one of the best movies of all time???

sunshine
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This is one doodle that can't be undid homeskillet.

FORSHIZZZ!!!

I'm already pregnant, what other kind of shenanigans could I get in to.

You should have gone to china you know cuz I hear they give away babies like free ipods

You're like the coolest person I've ever met and you don't even have to try you know...
"I try really hard actually."

The little pink plus sign is so unholy.

All you've got in your stomach is Taco Bell

GEEZ BANANA! SHUT YOUR FREAKING GOB!!

Hey your book fell apart! It must have looked at your face!

Your little girlfriend gave me the stinkeye in class yesterday.

sunshine
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D-R-A-M-A Whaddas that spell? My life.

2010-02-01T13:59:00.000-08:00

So lets put it this way, substandard choices were made this weekend resulting in drama rearing it's ugly head yet again.

I was so happy with my below-the-radar life and friends and all of a sudden, boom. gone. I guess drama really likes me, and it's like my siamese twin, always glued to my side. Ugh.

I found a facebook group that brightened my day though- "when sluts hate other sluts for being sluts". Thanks facebook, at least you understand.

We're not going to go into the details or anything just because it's pointless. Most of the drama i'm going through is the result of miscommunication. You know, yellow journalism of sorts, people exaggerating the story to its breaking point to make it sound more sensational.

But the point is, I'm not going to let it get to me. That's been my philosophy in the past and it's worked so far, so we'll see.

If only it was this simple...^^^

Food for Thought

2010-01-29T15:11:00.000-08:00

I you google the word 'anorexia' the fifth thing that comes up is a pro-ana website.

If you search 'thin and beautiful' the first two things that come up are pro-ana sites, and the suggested search is 'how to become anorexic'.

According to the National Eating Disorder association, one in five girls and women has disordered eating, 90% of those women being between the ages of 12 to 25.

When did it become beautiful to starve yourself? In a Nation where most people are fortunate enough not to be dying of hunger, some people are still emitted to hospitals because they refuse to eat.

But when their hair falls out, will they still look in the mirror, and see perfection? When their bodies stop working, will they thinks it's all worth it?

Credit- http://www.socialworktoday.com/archive/092109p20.shtml

For all those girls who won't let themselves eat, at least have a little food for thoght^^^

Yup, my weekend was spent with vampires.

2010-01-26T16:47:00.000-08:00

My new favorite band of the moment? Vampire Weekend! My favorite so far is Habanera. I have been going through an indie rock phase, I even got my brother obsessed with the video for here it goes again by OK GO. He wants to try it lol. And of course this obsession has nothing at all do to with the fact that mitcheldavis talked about those very bands on livelavalive, nooo nothing at all. (hehe im such a fan of mitchel, he has the best taste of style and coolosity and all of that, plus hes rather hot, tho I am not such a fan of the gages:/)

I also got the book HUNGRY by Crystal Renn, it's her story about how she got out of a small town in Mississippi, battled anorexia, and became the most successful current 'plus sized' model. It was amazing, I finished it in two days and stayed up until lateish reading (probably why im so dang tired). I want to use it as the main piece of my research paper for English, we're researching social issues, but we're supposed to use a realistic fiction book for that. So I lied and said it's fiction, cross your fingers and hope she doesn't go check up on it!

I also got THIRST by Christopher Pike. I liked it because at the time i started reading it I had just read a cliqued TWILIGHT knockoff aimed for 10 year old in which the main character defeated the vampire/pixie/badguys with spoons. Yup, spoons. And I actually think that scene was supposed to be the most intense scene of the book-lame. I was so relieved that when the characters in Thirst fought the antagonists, it wasn't with an exchange of smart ass comments and a ridiculously impossible escape by their grandmother and wolf/boyfriend. His writing style kind of reminds me of James Patterson, and by that I mean that as soon as one badguy is beaten, another one pops up out of the blue. And there are like three different stories in one book, I think it should have been broken up. But thats really the only issue I have with the book otherwise its really good.

Letters from Paris...

2010-01-12T20:57:00.000-08:00

Isn't it crazy how we all want the one thing we can't have?

That sounds so cheesy, but put down your black berry for a second and think about it. Have you ever wanted a different phone? Like the iphone with its crazy ammount of apps or the palm pre or something? Well I have always wanted a black berry. So it's like a cycle. Actually, that's a pretty lame example.

Take Elizabeth: The Golden Age. The movie about Queen Elizabeth I made in 2007. In the movie the Queen of England who is super amazing, is loved by practically her whole country, and has the most entertaining personality ever wants to be her maid, b/c she is young, beautiful, and guys follow her around as though they were puppies with their leashes tied to her very presence. But Beth, the maid, envys the Queen of England b/c she has unlimited wealth and power. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.

And I know it's greener in Paris...

"Wisely and slow; they stumble that run fast."
-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

No more Fez):

2010-01-08T21:42:00.001-08:00

Sadly, my that 70's show obsession has ended. But only b/c they only made 8 seasons! I started like halfway through winter break and just now finished. BEST. SHOW. EVAR. My previous post is all of their best quotes(:

I'm currently watching marrie antoniette online. LINK HERE----> http://www.tudou(dot)com/programs/view/ZcKw6amJi50/

For some reason I have become obsessed with old time royals. I can't explain it, but that time period fascinates me. It was a time where you could have unlimited wealth and power by only your charms, your looks, or knowing the right people.

That sounds boring... But really I mean all the best drama came from times like that. Romeo and Juliet is a true story, exaggerated for stage of course, but there actually was a Romeo and a Juliet. It's crazy what people did back then! I just finished watching The Other Boleyn Girl, it's about King Henry and Anne Boleyn with Natalie Portman, Scarlet Johanson, and that reeaally hot guy from Across the Universe. Basically, this power-hungry family used their two daughters as pawns to get higher up in social standing. Anne's family saw her as so meaningless, that they got rid of her completely when she was no longer needed and they found another pawn. She was ruled guilty by her OWN UNCLE. Who, btw, is an ass.

And I'm also looking forward to Youth In Revolt with Micheal Cera(: <3 him X100000!! I had the songs from the commercial stuck in my head allll day yesterday, it looks so good i can't wait ahahaa.

I'm not sure how to end this really soo...
If you could be anyone who evar lived, whoooo wud u be?
Tell me in the comments beloooow *points to comment section below*

That 70's Show!!

2010-01-06T14:09:00.000-08:00

Red Forman: If the US government decides to stick a tracking device up your ass, you say, "Thank You. And God Bless America."

Red Forman: Once again, an open bar spells disaster for the Foreman family.

Eric: I believe that everyone's political opinion is valid, and worth hearing.
Red Forman: Well that's perfect Eric. Use that line when you run for Miss America.

Kitty Forman: I can't believe that any of you can walk into a church without bursting into flames.

Fez: Eric, what a glorious man-ring.

Donna Pinciotti: So how'd your parents react?
Eric: Surprisingly, not so good. It turns out that Red has a temper.

Michael Kelso: Your soul is like an appendix. I don't even use mine.

Michael Kelso: The truth is out there, man, it's out there.
Fez: No more for you.

Donna Pinciotti: [when Eric wears a Chicago Bears jersey at a Green Bay Packer game] The Packers are like the Jedi. You're wearing a 'Go Darth Vader' jersey.

Michael Kelso: [shouts] Ooooh! Burn! That's a burn about a burn! That's a 2nd degree burn!

Kitty Forman: Why don't you try some of that forgiveness that Jesus talked so much about so much?

Red Forman: This is a smoke detector.
Michael Kelso: Does that detect any type of smoke?

Nina: You're stubborn, under qualified and can barely speak English... Welcome to the DMV.

Eric: Hey Dad, you know who has the right idea? Russia.

Laurie Forman: You should watch your back.
Jackie Burkhardt: You should stop spending so much time on yours.

Steven Hyde: Oh yeah, Laurie? And what exactly do you do? Oh, yeah - the Packers.

Ricky: Where do you see yourself in five years?
Steven Hyde: Prison.

Fez: I choose boobs!
sunshine
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A New Begining

2010-01-05T15:45:00.000-08:00

I've heard there are 5 stages of grief. Five different phases that you have to go through to overcome a death.

Well here are the stages of breakup:
-I can't belive it's over
-I'm so sorry
-I say I hate you but I want you
-I can't stand you
-I've finally moved on

And I'm so glad because I've gone through them all, and now everything is gonna be okay.

So here's to a new year. I'm not sure whats gonna happen, but whatever it is, I know I'll get over it and I'm sure I'll be alright.

Happy 2010(:
sunshine
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Obsessed

2009-12-10T16:26:00.000-08:00

I hate how I still smile when I'm by him...
And I think about him when I'm not.
He doesn't do that to me does he? No. He proabably doesn't.

But in a way... I wish he did.

Kate Nash: Nicest Thing

sunshine
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March 5, 2010

2009-12-05T23:00:00.000-08:00

I have always been a huuge Tim Burton fan, ever since I was literally 5 I would go to blockbuster and I would always look for a movie in the family section, and every time I would ask to see the Nightmare Before Christmas. I don't really know why, I guess because I thought it looked cool? Well anyways, my parents thought it was too old for me so wasn't actually able to rent it until about 3rd grade. I loooved at immediately! Here comes Halloween was my favorite song for weeks and of course I saw Corpse Bride, Sleepy Hallow, Edward Scissorhands and Charlie and the Chocolate factory and all those Tim Burton movies. (the only ones i haven't seen are beetle juice, mars attacks, and bug fish)

And unless you live under a rock or just don't go to the movies you have probably seen a commercial for his remake of Alice in Wonderland which comes out March 5, 2010. I'm excited!! But I went on youtube today and I saw that the scyfy channel is also doing a remake, which looks good but also pisses me off a bit because it's sorta copying Tim Burton.

Just Friends

2009-11-27T22:52:00.000-08:00

Have you ever met a guy whose like really special to you? I haven't. Thhings have always gotten f-ed upp. And you know what? I'm tired of it. So next time, whoever you are, let's just be friends for now. Cuz I've been hurt once, and that's enough for a lifetime.
sunshine
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Thanks for the memories, even though they weren't so great.

2009-11-25T16:39:00.000-08:00

Before I had this long ass sob story about how I felt about this guy... but this pretty much sums it all upp
VVV
sunshine
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4th kind= real or not?

2009-11-14T09:09:00.000-08:00

Ok so this is what I found. There WERE a string of disappearances in a small town on Alaska's west coast. The people that went missing were mostly men from the area who were traveling back from smaller towns. There were 20 cases that the local police looked into, they found that hypothermia and alcoholism caused all of the cases except 9, im saying this b/c the bodies of those 9 people were never actually located.

At the beginning of the movie the actress Milla Jovovich tells us she will be portraying Dr. Abigail Tyler leading us to belive that the movie is some sort of documentary, which is pretty much bs. This is a hollywood scifi thriller kids, it was made to make muchos $, not to inform us about what happened in Nome, Alaska in the year 2000.

Also the movie wasn't even filmed in Alaska. It was filmed in Bulgaria. Thats not even in the US! That is some far off place where soccer is the #1 sport and they eat crumpets instead of sammiches, aka NO WHERE NEAR ALASKA.

And about this "real footage", lets clear one thing up, I have no way to prove that it's legit or otherwise but if you googled Abigail Tyler b4 this movie came out I really doubt anything would come up. I mean come on! If this stuff was real it wud be all over the internet! I wouldn't have to spend hours searching for the footage, it should be the first thing that came up on google, but you cannot find it at all. And one website I went to even said that the footage was 'based on true events', not actually real.

So believe what you want I guess, but if you see an owl outside your window tonight, I wouldn't get too worked up.

http://www.examiner.com/x-22738-New-Haven-Movie-Examiner~y2009m9d5-The-real-story-behind-The-Fourth-Kind
http://www.makli.com/nome-alaska-abductions-0010463/
http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Movies/11/06/fourth.kind.real/index.html

My Hair is Retarded

2009-11-13T23:39:00.000-08:00

Hey, just got back from THE 4TH KIND. Woooowowoww, how do I describe it... Besides lame I mean... No I'm kiddin it wasn't terrible it was okay. It has alot of "real" footage, however I seriously doubt that sh*t is real. I'll look it up to see fer sure and post it sometime later this week when it won't scare me. (I have all the lights on in my house right now lol)

Ok, so you know how all the famous chicas have that pretty hair thats in sorta large, loose curls? Well juicystar07 on youtube did a tutorial for that so I checked it out and you're supposed to get a 2 inch curling iron. And thats actually pretty big so the Ulta store I went to only had one brand that had a 2 inch, it was a brand called HotTools. I don't know if you have ever heard of that b4 but I haven't... Anyways I took it home and i tried it out and it wont curl my hair. Like at all. So either I have retarded hair or somethings wrong with the curler. Idk but thats still $50 out the door :(

Also as u know i love the website www.fmylife.com. But I found something better!! www.textsfromlastnight.com = amazing. Not fer childrenz but halarious.

sunshine
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Phone Conversations Part 1

2009-11-11T12:13:00.000-08:00

Just a few things here, the story of this post didn't actually happen to me but to someone i know and i will post others that continue the story.

"Yeah, he is soooo sweet! I was like awww!! ... Oh don't worry, you'll find a great guy someday too! ... What do you mean he's not great? ... You can tell me, I can keep a secret ... 'Come oonnnn pleeaase tell me! ... What do you mean I won't like it? ... Just tell me anyway ...... Wait really? He said that? ... To who?! ... I can't belive it ... Well that can't be true .... You're not even in his math class- ... Mr. Goo, 5th hour? ... but i thought, i-i thought ... Why would he tell people? It was supposed to be our secret ... Well who else did he tell?! ... Oh shit, oh shit, so everyone knows! I can't belive it, oh my god ... They're calling me a skank?! ... H-he wasn't supposed to tell people, th-they weren't supposed to know ... No it's not okay! ... What do you mean I should have thought about it before?! ... What are you talking about, of course we can still be friends ... Are you still there?! Hello? Hello?!"

http://www.codinghorror.com/blog/images/rotary-phone.jpg

Cheater.

2009-10-26T01:12:00.000-07:00

I should be shocked. I should be... insanley jealous... I should be crying.

Well I am crying. But I'm not shocked, I knew it was happening.

I knew, in the end, you were gonna choose her.

It's funny cuz all my friends said I was lucky, that I had the one guy they knew that wouldn't cheat.

It's funny cuz they're wrong... I had the guy that did.

So, this is it. And I know that you don't care cuz you have... her.

Even though she's supposed to be taken and has a million other guys, you picked her...

Even though you said I was beautiful. And special.

Well I'll give you this much, you're a good liar.

But I guess lying and cheating go hand in hand, don't they?

sunshine
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With her

2009-10-25T23:20:00.000-07:00

He looks at me, he thinks pretty face...

He looks at her, pretty body.

He looks at me, he thinks nice...

He looks at her, he thinks amazing.

He talks to me, awkward.

He talks to her, out of this world.

He stays with me because shes taken...

He would be with her if he could.

sunshine
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...why so serious?

2009-10-25T00:33:00.000-07:00

Some one I really care about told me today that they don't like how I'm never serious. At first I was... I guess you could say shocked? And I got really upset.

Me being sarcastic all the time is sort of like a shield. It was originally so you couldn't see my natural personality but I think it has gotten to the point where i don't have a natural personality anymore.

So, in all seriousness, that hurt.

Sci Fi story maybe?

2009-09-30T23:25:00.000-07:00

you laugh b/c i'm different, I laugh b/c your all the same.

^^^ a good quote i think... kinda harsh though hahaa.

I couldn't think of anything to put since i will no longer be b*tching about my personal problems... so heres the begining of a story i found on my computer. Enjoy!

Rachel stared out at the smoking ruins of the wall. Aware, but not listening to, the screams of her family members. The creatures with metal bodies poured into her small out of date home. Hands out wanting to grab her. But not just her it seemed. No, these creatures were after the entire human race, and would stop at nothing until every human on the wet blue planet was enslaved to do their mysterious bidding. This was the year 2031. And the human race was coming to an end.

Some people, a lot of people in fact, thought the world would end in fire. Rachel Barker knew better though. The world was going to end in water, and that was apparent by the streets that were slowly turning into canals. Threatening, it seemed, to swallow the small, suburban culture she knew and turn into the undersea kingdom of Atlantis.

Allright thats all... oh btw googlechrome is waaay better than internet explorer!

sunshine
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Dating Advice (For Dummies)

2009-09-17T15:47:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I get told alot that I'ma pretty amzing advice giver. So, today, I decided to share my talent with the world. I'm going to answer some commonly asked questions, and if you have any more, leave them as comments, ok?? Ok. Here goes: (Btw, Q stands for question and A stands for answer. Just in case you were wondering.)

Q: How do I know if a guy likes me?
A: Go ask him dumb*ss.

Q: I'm afraid to hold my boyfriend's hand b/c my hands sweat, what should I do???
A: Constantly wear rubber gloves to protect yourself, and the rest of the world, from your nasty sweaty palms.

Q: Im a 14 year old girl and I've never had my first kiss. What should I do??
A: Hire a male prostitute. Or, if that's a but too extreme, pay some little kid to kiss you with candy and actionfigures-problem solved.

Q: What body launguage clues do guys give off when they like you?
A: Usually their mouth will form the words "I like you" while the noise "eyee liike youu" comes outt

Q: What are the best nights to go out on a date?
A: Any day but wednesday

Q: What do I do if my boyfriend doesn't want to kiss me?
A: Depends on the reason. For instance, you could be extremly unattractive, in which case I suggust plastic surgery. Either that or he's gay (im not being rude i love gay people). Or prude.

Q: Should you date a friend?
A: No, only people you hate.

Q: When should I call my ex?
A: Never

Q: Whats the best thing to say to someone that dumped you?
A: In my experience, the phrase "f*ck you" works quite well

Q: Would you let a friend of yours date your mother?
A: Ok, wtf^^^

Q: Have you ever kissed anyone named Mike?
A: No.
Q: Would u like to?
A: ....

Q: When is a kiss dangerous?
A: When your kissing a spy. Like in James Bond.

Q: Is dating a married person asking for trouble?
A: No, not at all! < sarcastic

Q: If a sexy woman tried to strip in front of you, what would you do?
A: Inform her that although I have no problem with gays or lesbians, I myself am straight and I would appreciate if she would keep her clothes on and walk away.

Q: How can you tell if your dating a gold digger?
A: If your wife is old enough to be your child you are dating a gold digger.

Q: What do you think of a 30 year old dating a 15 year old?
A: ...Gag me with a spork, thats disgusting.

Q: Whats the most cowardly way to break up with someone?
A: Have your friend do it on myspace in the middle of the night while you are on a plane to a deserted island with no cell/internet service for a month. One of my friends actually did that.

Q: What would you do if your ex showed up at your house rite now?
A: Ask him how the hell he knows where I live.

Q: Where are the pictures of your ex?
A: The trash of course

Q: Do you recomend blind dating and why?
A: No, it's weird. Going out with someone you just met like 5 seconds ago is like screaming rape mee.

Q: What do you think about friends with benifits?
A: Theyre perfect for sluts and people afraid of commitment!

Q: Do you like to talk about yourself on dates?
A: Not at all. I talk about quantum physics only.

Q: If I asked you out on a date, would you go?
A: Are you the wolf guy from twilight? No? Then no chance buddy

Q: Is it true that guys don't like to be asked out?
A: Finnally a good question! No, it's not true, but it makes them look less manly, and they hate that.

Q: What's the best pickup line?
A: Well there are a few...
1.) Were you talking to me? No? Then please start.
2.) Your eyes are the same color as my Porche.
3.) I lost my fone #, can I borrow yours?
4.) Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water back home.
5.) Bond. James Bond. sunshine
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short and sweet sucka

2009-09-06T22:16:00.000-07:00

if you dance like no one's watching, everyone will watch.

sunshine
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Invisible Girl- awww yea.

2009-09-04T15:17:00.000-07:00

Heloooo. I just got home from skool, it's friday, and instead of going to my skool's first Varsity football game, I get to go (joy of joys) hip hop rehersal. Wooo.

Something that really pissed me off this week was this, I had talked to this guy I sort of know over the weekend, he seemed nice, so I got him # and trying texting him. We had went to skool together last year and he said hi to me a few times this year so I didn't think it would be aqward. I was wrooong. Apparently, he has no idea who I am. I'm not really sure how he could suddenly forget my name, and the fact that we went to skool together since 6th grade, but apparently he did. Am I like invisible?? And if I am, why didn't any1 tell me before???? I could have used the power for the greater good, like superman! Actually, more like the invisible girl frum fantastic four, seeing as superman wasn't invisible. Just strong and stuff. Ok, now I'm babbaling...

I'm actually going to start using my youtube account for suff besides commenting all of Shane Dawson's videos now! (And by the way, isn't Shane like amazing? He won Mr. Youtubeee.) Yea so I'm gonna put some vids up, the name of the account is zebraluverr, but I think I'm going to change it to something cool. Like, THE ELITE. (<-aww yea) Here are my favorite people on youtube, for you dorks that only go on there to watch music videoz (: 1. ShaneDawsonTV. He's halarious, my favorite video of his is the "Lady Gaga wants to kill me" one, it's on his channel, check it out! 2. RayWilliamJohnson. Ray got second in WhatTheBuck's Mr. Youtube contest! Which is amazing b/c I watched his vids when there were, like, 30,000 people watching them, and now they get millions of hits. 3. NiggaHigga. That sounds racist, but it isn't, they're asian and funny as hell. 4. WasteTimeChasingCars. The guy in this is soooo funny, and he does the best Fred immatation on youtube. 5. WhatTheBuck. He mostly just talks about news, but he makes fun of Hannah Montanah alot so he's pretty funny. 6. CommunityChannel. The girl in this is Australian and halarious, and I can do a really awesome Australian accent which is part of the reason I like her videos, lol. 7. BrittneyLouisTaylor. Her best video is everything's gonna be ok, a spoof on party in the usa, but like sad. And alot better. Idk, you just have to watch it. 8. Livelavalive. Michel Davis used to be really hot, now he's just ok, but his "random" videos are pretty funny. 9. DaveDays. He just barley makes the list. Yeah, he's like amazing talented at guitar, but that's all he does is make music vids. His best one is 7 things i like about you. (Hanah montanah spoof) And then there's THE STATION, which is really funny, but it's in a different catagory, and it's not as good since Shane left. college humor and fail blog are also good, but they're not done by youtubers, they're like corporatians, so they're not as good. And also they have adds on them which drive me insaaaane. Yeah, so go get a youtube account if you don't have one, and just like post a bunch of random vids, they actually will get recignition if they're decent. sunshine
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Now that you've heard me rant, Adios!
Luuuuurve,
LexyLoooo(:

Sprinklers and playing house!

2009-08-26T15:04:00.000-07:00

Hiii. Just got back frum my friend Sarah's housee, today was actually surprisingly ok. Cuz like usually I hate Wednesdays b/c I always have bad days. Like the Jahmba Juice Wednesday at my old school...

OK so what happened was this. Every Wednesday at my old middle skool they sold Jahmba Juice in the mornings, so we would always get there early to buy some. So one day, I asked my mom for Jahmba Juice $, but she was in a pissy mood so I had to use my own. Then, my bus was late, so I tried to run to the Jahmba Juice stand, while wearing my new ED HARDY shoes. I slipped in mud. So i asked my friend to wait in line for me when I went to wash off the mud, but she took off after like 5 minutes so I had to start at the back of the line. I finnally got to the front right b4 they run out and got the last one, but it was this nasty peach flavored one and it was all frozen, so i used the straw to try to poke the ice and break it up. I poked a hole in the cup. It finnaly started to thaw out when I was on my way to science, and I was drinking it, and I went to sit down and my teacher asked me what was on my leg, I said I slipped in mud, and he told me that actually it was fertilizer b/c they were redoing the grass. So i actually got fertilizer on my new shoes. Then he told me to go throw away my Jahmba Juice b/c i wasn't allowed to drink it in class, so i did. He was kidding.

Today wasn't that bad.

But anyways, my skool got out early so I went to Einstein's bagels with a few of my friends from lunch, then we walk to my friend Sarah's house. Let me just say she has like the coolest house evar! So a few of us wanted to watch a scary movie b/c she has like a whole shelf full. Well, apparently Sarah hates scarry movies, so we were gonna watch step brothers. Then the other Sarah said no b/c she's not allowed to watch R rated movies. She's 15. There were no parents in the house so why the hell couldn't she have watched te movie? But noooooo. So we decided to play wii instead. Well we got bored in like the first 5 seconds so me and my friend Courtney were like lets have a dance party! So we tried to have a dance party in Sarah's basement but she wouldn't let us use the stereo. Or her laptop. So we were like wow, ok fine and we just played music from my fone.

Well she left and didn't want to be in the dance party. Whatever. But that didn't stop us so we were just like jumping around in the living room for awhile but there were no guys or strobe lights or good music so we got bored and were like ok fine lets do something else. Sarah wanted to play apples to apples. Michelle wanted to watch pocahontas. Other sarah wanted to play house. And Jasmine wanted to do her HW. So me and courtney were like wow, this is lame, and we left to go walk around the neighborhood.

WELL... we got lost. Haahaa. So we decided to go run in the sprinklers and stuff in this one green belt and then we found our way back to Sarahs house. Everyone was mad that we ditched. And then I had to go home. But watever it was funn. :)

sunshine
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muchaco=boy?!

2009-08-25T23:10:00.000-07:00

Well, if you know me, you know that I usued to talk in spanish over texts all the time. And i always called my friends muchacho, except i can't actually speak spanish.

Here's thing thing: muchacho means boy in english. Sorry guys! Hahaa

Oh and check out fmylife.com, it's halarious! My favorite?

Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML

and

Today, I tasted the rainbow. By that, I mean a homeless man hit me in the face with a bag of Skittles for not giving him money. FML

and

Today, I dropped my keys. Not wanting to lean over and pick them up, I pointed at them and said "Accio." Then I realized I had tried to use a Harry Potter spell in real life and in public. FML

and

Today, my mom walked in on me looking at a 1978 playboy. She asked if I found it in the basement. I said yes. Then I realized she was the centerfold. FML

Ahahahahahahahaaahahahaha! Sorry those always crack me upp. Ok well this was a pretty short post for me but watevers. Adios!

sunshine
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Luv ya bitch,
LexyLoooo:)

hiya kiddies.

2009-08-25T22:42:00.000-07:00

Wats up my one follower? Haha u prob don't even check this n e more. And who are you anyway?

I was sitting at home doing homework the other day at like 2 am (yes i do save it till the last minute) and i realised something. All my friends are sluts. And it's not that I don't like them, I love most of them to death, I just never realised it until now. It was a bit of a shock... ya know? B/c it just hit me that we're growing up. And like this is it, ya no, the last four years of our lives as kids before we grow up and live on our own. It's not that that thought scares me... it simply leaves me dumbfounded. Just the other day I was graduating from elementary school and here I am, frosh at my high school. It's, like, amazing.

And it's hard for me to grasp, now, that I spent so much of my life hiding my face behind a book b/c i was afraid if people looked at me, they wouldn't like what they see. Now i know better. My new favorite quotes are:
don't worry what people think, they don't do it very often
and
be who you are and say what you want b/c the people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind. (By doctor Sues :P)
B/c really, who gives a shit what other people think? They don't know my life :). I guess that seems sort of rude haha. But honestly, I'm to the point where I don't really care what people who don't know me say.

I learned alot this summer. I think the most important thing was that when something bad happens, you can't just sit on your ass waiting for things to get better! You got to get the hell up and do it for yourself. B/c if you just keep waiting for people to help you or feel sorry for you or whatever, they might never come. And honestly? This life is too short to waste waiting on someone else.

One of my friends decided to start being a b*tch to me this summer, shes in my science class. Today I went up to her and told her I liked her hair b/c I'm trying this new thing called being nice. It's really hard.

sunshine
layouts.

It's 10:59 right now, if sitting here eating a popsicle and finishing my spanish hw. Yum.
Thx for listening to me rant ;)
XOXO,
Gossip Girl.

No just kidding hahaa. Adios, luuuurve LexyLoooo(:
(^^^and yes i read angus thongs and full frontal snogging, it's pretty good, but not as good as gossip girl of coursee.)

Hi(:

2009-06-01T11:15:00.000-07:00